A Weighty Issue

I'm now down 4 lbs. since Monday...and yes I'm exhausted as well. Even when I put myself to bed at 11pm, I can't seem to calm my brain down enough to fall asleep...thus when I get up at 6am, I haven't quite had enough sleep. Granted this time I'm sure it was due to having coffee at 8pm last night...not smart, but it did help get me through rehearsal as I was the walking dead beforehand.

There has been an uproar lately (well, it's always a delicate subject) in the Opera Business about weight. Why singers with great voices, but also have a bit more girth aren't being hired. Sadly, I think if you've ever had weight issues and are in an entertainment position, then perhaps you've been privy to this predicament. Personally, I've been on both the winning and losing side based on my looks in general. One audition where I was still at the 185 lbs range, I lost the romantic lead role to an untrained, very vocally challenged singer, and this was for a musical show...another audition I lost because I looked too old, and then another where I looked too young...my point is, that it doesn't really matter what you look like, they're going to cast who they feel fit the role at that point in time...period. That doesn't mean that I'm never going to sing that role or with that company, but that I just don't fit into their idea for that moment.

Why am I so concerned with my weight? Well, as much as it does help me to be thinner in the business that I'm in, its really for my own reasons. I want to be healthy...I really do. I hate hospitals and I'm terrified of needles, thus if I keep myself healthy, I can avoid them for a very long time (God willing). Besides I feel good when I'm eating well, and staying active...plus it's more fun to fit in my clothes than to struggle with that damn zipper that just doesn't want to cooperate sometimes ;) I made the choice to fight my "genetics" and you know what, I'm winning. Sure it takes time, perseverance, and some sacrifice...but in the end, it's so worth it and I'm better for it in the end (which hopefully is a long way off, say 80+ years from now?)

I know that sometimes when we're at a certain weight that the end goal seems impossible and we want to give up...but if we remember to set little goals and keep achieving those goals, the ultimate goal will be standing right in front of you within reach before you know it. And it feels so good to know that you can reach out and grab those brass rings to obtain what you want, no matter what it is. Heck I'm already almost halfway to my first goal that I set this week...I just have to keep on keepin' on...and don't think for a moment that I won't.

Today's log / stats:

Weight: 152 lbs.

8:30 am - 1 medium orange (62 calories) & 15 raw almonds (105
calories)

10:30 am - Cup of Oatmeal (147 calories) with 2 tbl. sp. each of Raisins (49 calories), Walnuts (60 calories) & Maple Syrup (100 calories).

*Important Note: It is now 11:30 am, and I have the shakes something terrible...I don't think my body likes the Maple Syrup, will try agave next time instead.

Organic decaf skim milk latte w/2 tsp. agave nectar (milk 110 calories + agave 28 calories)

2:30 pm - Organic Huevos Rancheros (365 calories) w/Guacamole (50 calories) and Homefries (266 calories)

Iced Peach Rooibus Tea

Whew...I'm already at 1,342 calories today...I've gotta lighten up for the rest of the day...say hello veggies.

5:30 pm - Coffee w/skim milk (110 calories)

7:30 pm - Organic Quinoa (127 calories) & Organic Red Beans (110 calories)

Total of 7000 steps today
Total of 1,589 calories

Have a great day!
Bex